Category: Hurt/Abuse

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The Last Thing He Needs Audiobook by JH Knight Narrated by Michael Stellman

Dreamspinner Presents:
http://www.audible.com/pd/Fiction/The-Last-Thing-He-Needs-Audiobook/B00V8S7KOW/ref=a_search_c4_1_1_srTtl?qid=1427654492&sr=1-1

last thing audioBlurb
Tommy O’Shea is raising his seven younger brothers and sisters without any help from his drug abusing father and stepmother. Since he was fifteen years old, he’s managed to keep the children fed and out of foster care. It takes up every ounce of his energy and the last thing he needs is romance complicating his life further.

Rookie cop Bobby McAlister doesn’t belong in Tommy’s harsh world, but Tommy can’t push him out. As their unlikely friendship turns into a tentative relationship, they weather the daily storm of Tommy’s life with a lot of laughs and more than a few arguments.

Tommy isn’t used to trusting outsiders, and he’s never asked for help in his life. But when a tragedy strikes the O’Shea family and threatens everything he’s fought for, he’ll have to learn to do both to recover from the brutal hit.
Review

(Book reviewed here previously.)

Tommy O’Shea has a rough, rough life. He’s in charge of his 6 younger siblings, didn’t finish high school, has drug-addled parents messing things up, and he’s very, very poor.

Bobby McAlister has been around for most of Tommy’s life. He’s an only child who lives at home with his recently widowed mother. He’s a gay cop who only wants to love and be loved.

It isn’t easy for Tommy to trust, everyone he knows has let him down, so when Bobby comes around, he is immediately treated with a heavy dose of skepticism.

Through time, perseverance and a lot of love, Bobby worms his way in and the result is this amazing love story written by JH Knight.

JH Knight a new author to me, but she now goes on my “must read” list.  I was blown away.
The story is so sweet, so tender, yet tough and gritty at the same time.

The problems Tommy and his family face are realistic and heart-breaking and I really loved that the “gay” part was really the least of their worries.

This was a story about trust, devotion, optimism and most of all, family. Despite all the odds and all the reasons why things really should not have worked out, family prevails, and in ways we could never predict.

I really loved the relationship between Bobby and his mother, June. I just think her involvement in the story added that the icing to this delicious cake of a book. She rounded out the family and brought everyone in that much tighter. She reminded us that you’re never too old to need a “Mommy”.

I felt the love scenes were erotic and touching and just numerous enough to add texture to the story without being the focus. The kids were amazing and I really hope we see more of their stories in the future.

I fell in love with this book and will definitely be reading it again.

JH Knight gave us a WONDERFUL present with this “Epilogue”:  https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog_posts/7586073-have-yourself-a-merry-little-free-short-read

Audio

Michael Stellman did a fantastic job with his narration here. He doesn’t do anything over the top with the voices but does a really solid job with the emotion and the timing of the story. He subtly changes the tenor to differentiate the different characters and it allows you to become immersed in the story. I really got swallowed up by both the wonderful words of JH Knight and the way it is so artfully told by Michael Stellman. This is one of those audiobooks I will listen to again and again and I can’t recommend it highly enough.

6 of 5 hearts!

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Black John Audiobook (Johnnies #4) by Amy Lane narrated by Gomez Pugh

Dreampsinner Presents  http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/store/product_info.php?products_id=6302

black john audioBlurb

John Carey is just out of rehab and dying inside when he gets word that Tory, the guy who loved him and broke him, has removed himself from the world in the most bitter way possible—and left John to clean up his mess.

Forced back to his hometown in Florida, John’s craving a hit with every memory when he meets Tory’s neighbor. Spacey and judgmental, Galen Henderson has been rotting in his crappy apartment since a motorcycle accident robbed him of his mobility, his looks, and his boyfriend all in one mistake. Galen’s been hiding at the bottom of an oxy bottle, but when John shows up, he feels obligated to help wade through the wreckage of Tory’s life.

The last thing John needs is another relationship with an addict, and the last thing Galen wants is a conscience. Both of them are shocked when they find that their battered souls can learn from and heal one another. It doesn’t hurt that they’re both getting a crash course on how growing up and getting past your worst mistakes sure beats the alternative—and that true love is something to fight to keep if your lover is fighting to love you back.

Review

(Book reviewed on this site previously.)

Where to start….

Well, first we all know Johnnies right – the made up porn studio that introduced us to Chase and Tommy, Dex and Kane, Ethan and Jonah and in a related way, Alejandro and Donny.  We LOVE Johnnies.  John… we don’t love so much.  He was a coke head, douche in Dex in Blue and though he had glimmers of the kinda guy Dex might befriend, by the time we actually meet him, he’s gone over the edge.

This is his story.

We start out with John getting out of rehab, he’s still pretty shaky, but determined, only to find out that this newly sober John has to fly to Florida (across the world practically) to help clean out the apartment and distribute the remains of his first (and only?) love who has committed suicide.

Uh…Thanks Amy for taking it easy on us.  NOT!

Tory and John grew up together, realized they were gay together, started doing porn together but I can’t really say they loved each other because Tory never treated John like someone he loved.

As time passes Tory descends down a spiral of sex and drugs and after years and three trips to rehab John decides Tory needs to do it on his own, cause whatever John is doing, isn’t helping.

Thus the birth of Johnnies.

Flash back to today, John is at Tory’s apartment where he meets the neighbor, Galen.  Galen is a lawyer who had a terrible accident three years ago, and has since been caught up in a cycle of depression and pain med addiction.

So… of course John is super attracted to Galen, but really – can he? Should he? Is it remotely smart for him to take on another addict?

**

If I were to rank my favorite Johnnies books the order would be Dex, Super Sock Man, Chase, John, Ethan…. Black John is a good book, Amy doesn’t write anything bad.  The angst is so painful.  Tory hurt John so much.  Dex (inadvertently) hurt John so much.  But… the one piece I missed with Black John that Chase and Dex and even Super Sock Man had was a bit more of a connection between the lovers.

I loved that John could finally help Galen and that Galen wanted to be strong enough to show John he deserved someone whole.  But I didn’t see them as a couple long enough to feel as attached to them as I have in other Amy Lane books.

On the other hand I absolutely loved that we got to see more of Dex and Kane again!

There is a bonus epilogue found here:  http://lovebytesreviews.com/2015/02/02/bonus-epilogue-for-black-john/  that really wraps things up nicely – Thanks Amy!!!

Audio

Gomez Pugh is amazing!  I love this new addition to the Johnnies series!  Gomez has a great voice and does a tremendous job at differentiating the different characters.  OMG! I was cracking up at his version of Tommy and Kane.  Tommy has this great Boston accent and Kane has a sweetly Hispanic lilt.  John is dry and self-effacing, Galen is deliciously southern, Dex is quiet and stern, Ethan is deep and rumbly… it goes on and on.  Though I loved the narrator for the previous books (Sean Crisden is one of my favorite narrators!) I really loved these added touches.  It absolutely bumped this great book to amazing and I highly recommend listening to this if you are a fan of the series.  It was delightful!

 

6 of 5 hearts!

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A Good Vintage Audiobook by Ashlyn Kane narrated by John Solo

Dreamspinner Presents
http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/store/product_info.php?products_id=6149

a good vintageBlurb

Luke Scherer has turned bad romance into an art. When he catches his latest deadbeat boyfriend selling Luke’s belongings – and his own body – to cover his debts, Luke decides he needs a vacation. He just doesn’t expect his Napa Valley retreat to be a step into his past.
Eight years ago Mal Kuijpers was grieving his wife while his vineyard floundered. Hiring Luke for the summer put the business back on track and a smile back on Mal’s face.
Nineteen-year-old Luke had just gotten out from under his father’s thumb and started saving for his education, his last screw-you to his old man. Then he made the mistake of falling for his boss, his dad caught up with him, and Luke panicked-and fled.
Now they have another chance. Mal has his own share of closet skeletons, including a family he doesn’t talk to and a dead wife he sometimes does, and he’s gone without romance for years. He works hard to convince Luke he’s worth more than a casual fling and asks for nothing in return, but Luke needs a relationship of equals. If Mal can believe in himself and Luke can believe in love, two hot summers might yield a lifelong reward.

Review

Luke is sent to Mal’s vineyard when his latest boyfriend is found selling Luke’s stuff and his own body! Mal was in Luke’s life years ago when Luke was young and running away from Luke’s abusive father. Mal, at that time, was a recent widow and considered himself too old and too sad to get involved with Luke at that time.

Now – Luke is feeling too cautious and insecure to want to jump right into another relationship, but Mal is ready and isn’t shy about letting that be known.

There are other roadblocks: Luke lives in LA, Mal in Napa. Luke is just now starting to really see his life on track and doesn’t see how moving to the country can help his fledgling architecture career. Not to mention that Mal was married to a woman for years. Luke doesn’t want to be an experiment.

However high the hurdles, these guys do manage to work through them all and we get a very HEA.

**

This is the first book I’ve read by herself, but I’ve really enjoyed her collaborations.
I think that if I had been reading this book it would have been a bit easier to appreciate the “flashback” style she used (at the end of each chapter is a snippet from the past to give us the back story of Luke and Mal). As a listener it was a bit disconcerting to be wrenched from a scene and thrust into the past… but it didn’t detract from my overall enjoyment of the book.

I really like Mal as a character. He was seasoned but still had an air of innocence to him that was refreshing. He didn’t play games and that was nice. I did think that it was odd that the couple would “fool around” without having sex for as long as they did, but I loved the relationship building that occurred.

The secondary characters were rich accompaniment to the main characters and I thought they added nicely to the overall book.

Audio

John Solo did a GREAT job with this narration. Mal’s voice is growly and divine! He didn’t make Luke over the top but was definitely a different character than Mal. I thought he handled the women’s voices well and overall I really enjoyed listening to this story.

Book 4 of 5 hearts
Narration 5of 5 hearts

Overall 4.5 of 5 hearts

4.5

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Fire Horse (Polo #1) Audiobook by Mickie B Ashling Narrated by Max Lehnen

Dreamspinner Presents http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/store/product_info.php?products_id=6147

fire horseBlurb

Preston Fawkes is ten the first time he meets fifteen-year-old Konrad Schnell at the San Antonio Polo Club. Captivated by the mystique surrounding the sport of kings, Pres vows to learn the game at the hands of his newly acquired friend and mentor. The hero worship soon grows into something deeper, but the friends are separated when Preston goes off to boarding school in England.

The relationship that follows is riddled with challenges―their age gap, physical distance, and parental pressure taking precedence over feelings yet to be explored. Although their bond goes deep, they deal with the reality of their situation differently: Preston is open and fearless while Konrad is reticent and all too aware of the social implications of making a public stand.

Their paths intersect and twine, binding them as tightly as a cowboy’s lasso, but fate may alter their plans. How will love overcome the divots in the turf as they gallop toward the future—one where obstacles no longer stand in their way?

Review
This book starts with Preston as an injured Polo player being told he should never play again and he’s lucky to be alive. We know he has 2 ex-wives and 2 children, and that Kon is NOT in his life, currently. (This should give you an idea of where things are headed…) Then we get to the flashbacks which take up the bulk of the book.

As a boy of ten Preston meets Konrad, a boy of 15, for the first time and learns from him what it means to be a Polo player. He acts as his groom and Kon mentors him in the sport.

Preston’s hero worship of Kon changes on the night he realizes that Kon is gay and that the feelings in his gut may be more than just friendship. Kon, as he should, rebuffs the now 13 year old’s advances.  He puts him off because a) he’s too young and b) the two are about to be separated by Kon’s joining the American Polo team and Preston’s going overseas to study.  But first the two share a passionate kiss.

Preston meets Ned at Eaton, a boarding school in England. Ned shows Preston how to be properly English and Preston gives Ned Polo lessons. After a while, Ned  becomes Preston’s tutor in gay sex as well as his close friend.

Preston and Ned don’t become boyfriends though, because Preston is saving that for Kon, whom he stays in touch with and occasionally meets.

Finally, when Preston is 17 he and Kon spend a chunk of time together and move their relationship forward, becoming lovers and long-distance boyfriends.

Here is where things go horribly wrong. Their relationship is discovered and Kon is forced to join the military and …. Well if I tell you it’s a big spoiler. Needless to say what happens next keeps Kon and Pres apart until the end of the story and for YEARS.

**
I really, really wanted to like this. I loved the idea. Polo, young love, age gap, geographical gap… It had a ton of potential.

The pre-eighteen year old sex did not bother me – that’s reality for a lot of people and I thought it was mostly handled well.

What did bother me: Kon never really seemed to love Pres as much as Pres loved him. Kon seemed to lust for Preston, but not love him. Preston was a jerk, and hard to like, so I don’t blame Kon. As an adult, Pres only gets worse.

The plot twists were far too many and too hard to believe. At times it was like a soap opera in the way that the lovers were kept from one another – for YEARS. If we have that much angst I need a huge batch of happy to make up for it and the reunion at the end did NOT make up for all the unhappiness. After all the torment we see our MCs through, they get about one paragraph of happy ending and the “celibacy issue”… I just didn’t buy it at all.

I did not like the on-page sex with people not the MC. That, more than the age thing, did really bother me.

I thought the writing was ok, but I didn’t feel a lot of authenticity from the characters. Preston’s dad was practically bi-polar (smacking Preston around then giving him a new pony.) Preston’s step-dad just going out and renting his 16 year old son porn seemed nuts. Preston’s mom even marrying Preston’s dad didn’t make much sense. Ned – putting up with Preston’s crap for so long.  And there are other areas where it didn’t feel real.

I just couldn’t connect well to either MC very well, thought the plot holes were too big to ignore and found the romance lacking.  If you are a fan of drama, you might like this.  There is a LOT of it.  If you want a tender and satisfying, relationship story, this is not for you.

Audiobook
Max Lehnen is hit or miss for me. I have heard him do some nice narrations, and I have heard him butcher some. In this case he had some tall orders. He had to do a wide range of ages, including aging the MCs from 10 to adult. He had several accents to do, Texan, British, and Preston’s odd British/Texas blend, women, kids, etc. I thought for the most part he did a great job handling such a demanding narration, though some of his accents were definitely better than others.

I give Max Lehnen 4 of hearts and the story 1 of 5 hearts which gives this an average of 2.5 hearts

2.5

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Fairytales for Modern Queers by Emily Reed

Dreamspinner Presents:  http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/store/product_info.php?products_id=5996fairy tales

Blurb

Gay teenager Hart could finish his fairy tale for class if his horrible stepsiblings would stop harassing him. Talia’s depression is like a sleeping curse and may kill her if she doesn’t ask for help. Independent, overweight bisexual Sienna deals with her “nice guy” neighbor while visiting her grandmother. When a mysterious girl climbs up Rachael’s fire escape, Rachael might finally break free from her overprotective mother. Transgender Amelia is bullied regularly for her identity, but she’ll show everyone exactly who she is. Princess Rellyn must face down a dragon since she’s seventh in line and battle her father since she’s not a boy, and she’s not sure which one is scarier. An adventurous knight whisks away genderfluid Noll when all they want is a quiet life on their farm. Mermaid Astrid wants revenge on the man who betrayed her, but is confused by her attraction to the one sailor immune to her song. Asexual Myka might love Princess Lysandria, but Myka must learn to control her inner werewolf before the king marries her off to “cure” her. With the help of a witch, blacksmith’s apprentice Malcolm must find his missing prince.

You’ve never heard stories like these at bedtime

Review

These are short – sometimes way too short – little LGBTQ takes on the old fairly tales.  In each there is a character or character that falls into that community who takes on a more modern/unique role.  Each story is a different set of people, using an old fairy tale as a template for a modern story.

The writing is good.  The idea is magnificent.  I really think that for the YA audience these will really ring true and find a home in the heart of the LGBTQ YA community.

However, for me, it felt like just as I was invested in the story – it ended.  So it was a little off-putting and frustrating.  I’d like to see these stories more fleshed out, I definitely think there is more that they have to offer.

I really liked that it wasn’t just gay or trans but a variety of gender roles/sexual orientations.  There really is something for everyone in this anthology.

Overall, I give it high points for the attempt with a little bit taken off for brevity.

If you are a YA fan I’d give this a try, it really is remarkable.

4 of 5 hearts

4

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Fire Inside Audiobook by Dawn Douglas Narrated by Randy Fuller

Dreamspinner Presents http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/store/product_info.php?products_id=6202

fire insideBlurb

After ten years as an active duty Marine, Captain Eric Ramos is rejoining civilian life. His first job is chauffeuring, assisting, and generally keeping track of NBA young gun Tyler Haley. Tyler’s had a rough few months, and his team owner is convinced he needs some hand-holding if he’s going to keep delivering wins for the St. Louis Fire Foxes.

Instead of the arrogant, over-privileged athlete Eric expected, Tyler is a big, blond, lonely twenty-three-year-old who needs more than just an employee to keep him in line. While taking care of Tyler, Eric changes from employee to friend, to something more. And when Eric realizes that something is burning the kid up from the inside out, he’s determined to find a way to help him before Tyler’s carefully constructed façade turns to ash.

Review

Tyler is a very, very young star basketball player who was recruited out of HIGH SCHOOL to play pro ball. He’s scared. He’s conflicted. He’s also gay.

Eric was hired because he’s gay. Tyler’s manager wants Tyler safe and so far all the staff either uses Tyler for his connections, his money, or his access to sex. Eric is seen as being immune to all that based on his past history and his indifference to the female form.

Eric is immediately attracted, both physically and emotionally to Tyler. He sees Tyler as a kid brother at first: needy, shy, naïve, innocent. When Eric begins to suspect Tyler might swing his way he’s conflicted about those feelings. He doesn’t want to take advantage of the guy but he’s also developed some serious feelings for him that go more than skin deep.

Tyler has had some super-bad experiences in h is past that make his life rituals important, and one night the team loses it’s winning streak, forcing Tyler to do something he hates, but feels is necessary to bring the team back to winning. It’s superstitious and awful, and it almost breaks him.

Luckily Eric is there to pick up the pieces and together they finally admit their attraction and begin to act upon it.

**
If you had asked me to rate this story at about the 50% mark I’d have given it 5 hearts, easily. It is so amazingly engaging. Dawn Douglas has created the perfect innocent paired with the toughest Alpha male and the sexual tension between them was both believable and hot. The separation between them was authentic and you questioned Tyler’s sexuality right along with Eric throughout most of the book. (Is he gay and closeted? Is he in denial? is he gay for Eric?… it was hard to tell!) The basketball stuff was a little unbelievable, but interesting and acted as a nice background for the romance to develop against.

I absolutely detested Tyler’s past (as I was supposed to) and felt wretched for how it affected him. I so wanted Eric to help him move through his fear and pain and know what real love is.

Without spoiling things for you, they do get together… in the last few paragraphs of the book. All that sexual tension is released with a few groping sessions and lots of tears and no resolution, let me say it again, absolutely NO resolution.  Eric does not get to help Tyler get through this, we can hope he might one day, but we are left without only hope.

The book/story just ends. POW.

I was flummoxed! Then pissed!

The story was so, so good and then it just ended… like the bell rang and the author had to turn her paper in at the end of class.

Since I was listening to the audio book I had to check to make sure I had the full story and that there wasn’t some technical error.

What I found was that, no, this is the entirety of the story, but that the ebook had this included as an epilogue/author’s note:

“I LOVE short stories. Not that novels aren’t wonderful, but there’s something special about being able to say everything you need to in a limited number of pages. And my favorite short story, bar none, is Frank R. Stockton’s The Lady, or the Tiger?
If you ask me when I’m irritated with my husband, stuck in traffic, or generally having a bad day, I’m pretty sure a tiger came out of the door to the right at the end of the story. When I’m in a better mood, a lady came out of the door, and the hero rode off into the sunset with his prize. I like the fact that the ambiguity of a short story leaves room for imagination.
In this novella, Tyler has some very serious history to address. Instead of turning what I had always intended to be a novella into a novel and exploring psychological issues that are far above my pay grade, leaving these particular characters with some ambiguity, with a happily for now, felt like the right thing to do.
That said, I’m the author, right? I created them, which means I’m allowed to suspend reality if I want to…
So in my mind, the real end to Tyler and Ram’s story goes something like this:
Tyler and Ram both found excellent counselors. The Fire Foxes won four successive NBA Championships. Tyler came out. The universe said, “Huh,” and moved on with life. Ram got his master’s degree from Wash U, went into politics, and changed the world. They got married, adopted baseball crazy twin boys, and were frequent guests on “Real Time with Bill Mahr.” And they lived happily ever after for the rest of their days.
The End.”

So, yeah. The author tells us that since this is her story she can end it however she wants and that in her mind the couple ends up with a HEA but she doesn’t owe her audience the actual WRITING of the HEA.

Without this author’s note, I would barely call it a HFN (Happy for now).

Needless to say, this did not sit well with me and it definitely affected my rating of the book.
I had really loved this story up until the (NOT) ending and was so, so disappointed at where it left off.

Audio
Randy Fuller is not my favorite narrator, but he does a fairly nice job with the narration. I enjoyed his voice choice for Eric, but felt that Tyler sounded a bit too old and not enough different from Eric.

All in all I can’t really recommend this book or audiobook because I wouldn’t want to inflict the frustration I felt on anyone else.

I give it a 2.5 of 5 hearts simply because Randy did a nice job and the writing was good up until the end, but the overall story/enjoyment really wasn’t there and I wouldn’t recommend it at all.

2.5

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Losing Control (Broken Pieces, 3)-Riley Hart

Publisher: Self Published

 On the surface, Ben seems to have it all: money, influence, good looks. He smiles and jokes in all the right places, but it’s all a façade. Inside he’s a wreck, and it’s only getting worse. With his Congressman father using Ben’s recent kidnapping for his own political agenda, and Ben still struggling to get over the only guy he’s ever loved, he feels like he’s losing his grip on reality and he’s quickly spiraling out of control.


Then he meets Dante, an enigma of a man with as much self-hatred as Ben has. In Dante, Ben finds what he didn’t know he needed: Dante’s control, his power, is the only thing that clears the fog in Ben’s brain. For the first time in his life, Ben has a lover who just might need Ben as much as Ben needs him. When they’re together, the demons from their pasts don’t lurk so heavily on their shoulders.

But Dante can’t fix him. Not when a memory from Ben’s past is haunting him in ways he doesn’t understand, waiting for him to put together the missing pieces in his head…and what he discovers just might have the power to break him for good.

  

This is the continuation of the Broken Pieces series and picks up telling Ben’s story.  If you are looking for a story that’s sweetly romantic with lots of sizzling sex, this is not what you’re looking for. If you’re not s fan of stories filled with angst, this is not what you’re looking for. But with that, I will strongly suggest you step outside your box and pick this book up. If you haven’t read the previous two in the series, I would strongly suggest that you do as to have a greater understanding of what is going on with Ben. 

Ah, Ben. Ben: the beautiful, confident, wealthy and powerful, sussessful defense attorney who has it all together. On the surface. But underneath that polished surface is a man in a tremendous amount of pain. Pain from his childhood, pain from an unrequited love of the past and present, pain from his family’s betrayal, pain from the horrific crime committed against him, the list goes on. Ben is a mess, mentally and physically. He realizes this but is powerless to stop it. In one of the BSDM club he frequents, he sees Dante for the first time and something about this man calls to Ben.

Dante, like Ben, is a man who is broken. He too has his demons from the past that he unable to shake. But one night, he looks up to see the gorgeous blond man who is struggling. There is an instant attraction but Dante does not want to get involved with Ben because he can’t save him. But that’s exactly what Dante did to a certain extent. 

These are two men, both with demons who need to be exorcised. They’re two men who are lost. Both adrift in their own seas of misery. Their pasts eating away at them gradually. 

Neither man is in a position, emotionally to embark on any type of relationship but they are drawn to and falling for each other. 

This book was hard for me to read, but not because it was badly poor written; no, it quite the opposite, actually! It was heartbreaking to read Ben’s ordeal. Poor man was sinking into the depths of alcoholism, fueled by his obvious and untreated PTSD. Being with Dante helped, but with both men being so damaged, neither was equipped to save the other.  This story’s ending was quite a surprise.  I’ll give you a tiny spoiler: Ben’s family will get their just desserts towards the end. It was one that I was quite satisfied with. 

Both men get their HEA, I am glad to say. Considering the pain that they had to endure, it made their HEA all that much sweeter. This series and this author is definite worth reading. 

Rated it: ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Amazon

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Signs by Anna Martin

Dreamspinner Presents http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/store/product_info.php?products_id=6171
signsBlurb

After spending most of his life in special schools, Caleb Stone now faces public high school in his senior year, a prospect that both excites him and threatens to overwhelm his social anxiety. As a deaf teenager, he’s closed himself off to the world. He speaks a shorthand with his parents and even finds it hard to use American Sign Language with people in his local deaf community. But Caleb finds comfort in his love of photography. Everything he can’t express in real life, he posts on his Tumblr.

Struggling to reconcile his resentment for his father’s cruelty with the grief of losing a parent, Luc Le Bautillier scrolls through Tumblr searching for someone who might understand his goth look and effeminate nature. When Luc reblogs a photo by Caleb, sparking a conversation, they both find it easier to make friends online than in person.

Luc and Caleb confront their fears about the opinions of the outside world to meet in New York City. Despite Caleb’s increasing confidence, his parents worry he’s not ready for the trials ahead. But communication comes in many forms—when you learn the signs.

Review

Caleb is a deaf, high school photography enthusiast who only wants to be normal. His past has made him a misfit in the deaf world and his present makes him a misfit in the hearing world. He is an amazingly hard worker and doesn’t realize how lonely he is.

Luc is a Goth teenager living in Manhattan. He’s surrounded by people who don’t understand him and only has a handful of people who truly care about him.

Both boys are looking for high school to end and yet both really couldn’t want more different things from life. Luc likes attention and hates the East Coast. His mother really isn’t… there and his sister is the person who he looks to for love and support. Caleb is an only child who is close with his parents but only wants to blend in and be invisible and can’t wait to move to NY.

When Luc sees a picture taken by Caleb online he is instantly attracted to it and the boy behind the art. They make a long distance, electronic connection that eventually leads to video chats, multiple daily texts and emails and finally an in-person meeting.

Though neither boy is “out” and neither has ever had a boyfriend (or girlfriend) they know that they are interested in the other “that way”.

From this point forward the boys move their long distance relationship along, growing closer and closer, spending more and more time together, both emotionally and physically.

When Luc needs a shoulder to cry on it’s Caleb he seeks out. When Caleb gets disappointing news, Luc is the one who can bring him out of his funk.

Finally, high school is over, Caleb is scheduled for an important surgery and college can be the next thing the boys tackle… together.

**

Wow! This is an amazing book. It is so simple in its premise: boy meets boy, boy kisses boy, boy falls in love with boy, HEA. But… each MC is so richly drawn and carefully constructed that the simple story only showcases the complexity of its characters.

The boys live polar opposite lives, but somehow have similar experiences of isolation and loneliness. They want their parents approval but don’t necessarily NEED it. They both love and hate their peer group and want to be their own true selves.

Though there are moments of tension, most of this story is a really slowly blossoming love story and coming of age story in one. Both boys grow and change and seem to fit better in their own skin by having known the other.

I have no idea if there is a part two, but there should be! When we leave both boys are really on the cusp of manhood and though you know their love is deep and abiding, I would love to see what happens to them on their own, with their new lease on life.

Anna Martin writes so smoothly that the story flows without effort and you are sucked into the lives of Caleb and Luc instantly, from page one.

I loved how the back story for each boy was never completely, fully explained, but dribbled out as the other learned it, in a very organic and real way. I really want to know what happened to Caleb to make him stop speaking and why Luc has nightmares, so I hope there is more to come for these boys.

The sexy times were sweet and tender and totally age appropriate, and though the story line is YA I think anyone would appreciate their story. Sex plays a role, but not the central role.

I can’t praise this high enough! 6 of 5 hearts!

amazing

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PS Isn’t the cover so beautiful?!

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Fighting Instinct Audiobook (L’Ange book 2) by Mary Calmes Narrated by Tristan James

Dreamspinner Presents:  http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/store/product_info.php?products_id=6253

FightingInstinctAUDMEDBlurb

L’Ange: Book Two

Only a privileged few know L’Ange’s head of security Arman de Soto is a shifter, and even fewer know he’s been systematically killing off a pack of werewolves. The reason for this vengeance is a secret Arman trusts with no one, quite the opposite of his obvious longtime pursuit of the château’s overseer, Linus Hobbes. Despite Arman’s reputation as a loner, the only thing he needs to complete his life is Linus. Predator and prey just don’t mix—but Arman won’t give him up.

Linus has lived alone for more than seven years, sheltered at L’Ange under an assumed name and hiding secrets of his own, including his terrifying attraction to the most dangerous man he’s ever met. Arman knows Linus should be afraid of the predator stalking him, but Linus is still drawn to him like a moth to a flame, no matter how much he tries to deny his instincts. It’s not until Linus’s past and Arman’s crusade exposes their secrets and opens L’Ange to attack that Arman realizes waiting any longer is a risk he just can’t take. So he’ll have to take his quest to the source of the threat in a gamble to protect L’Ange, Linus, and any future they might have together.

Review (previously posted for the book)
We met Arman in Old Loyalty, New Love. He was the mysterious bodyguard who helped protect Roman and Quade. Though we were led to believe he was interested in a certain jackal named Tucker, we find out quickly that this was a red-herring, serving to stir jealousy in the heart of Linus.

Linus is the fastidious and cold caretaker of L’Ange. It’s clear he’s been abused in his past and we learn early on just how terrible that abuse was. Arman has been Linus’ protector and often his touchstone for years, but the time has come for that relationship to develop to its full potential and Arman isn’t waiting any longer.

Arman is a man of mystery. We don’t know what he is, though we all think he must be a shifter – it isn’t until quite a bit into the story that we figure out just what he is. (I think everyone will be surprised by the reveal!)

In addition to hiding who he is, he also hides what he does. We find out that he has an agenda- a vendetta really – of epic proportions. This vendetta makes him almost an anti-hero. He’s definitely not the typical perfect Alpha we have seen in other Mary Calmes’ stories. He’s got a dark side that he’s embraced fully.

Surprisingly, Linus is perfectly okay with this dark side and in fact, he too embraces the vendetta and we see some pretty significant changes in his personality as a result of this.

One of the things I really liked about this story was that Linus and Arman get together pretty early on. They work as a team for most of the story and it was imminently satisfying to watch their relationship grow and deepen while they worked together.

Though it might seem a bit blood-thirsty, the vendetta is explained really well and at no time did I feel that there was any other possible course of action than that which Arman took.

I really felt that in this “universe” the animal natures of the shifters were really well developed and “authentic”. These aren’t people who just happen to have the occasional “furry power” thrown in to explain insta-love and mating. They are truly unique beings with a different set of rules and personalities.

I loved that Roman wasn’t quite on board with the vendetta. Sure, he loves Linus and despised what happened to him, but he wasn’t born a shifter and he still sees things through a human lens and judges by a different rule-book.

Mary Calmes is amazing at world building and her shifter universe is unique, creative and very well developed. She isn’t afraid to stray from typical “shifter” lore and she draws us in with her own clever style.

The chemistry between Arman and Linus is scorching hot. Mary writes excellent sex scenes and the sexual tension and it’s subsequent release is phenomenal in Fighting Instinct.

Though it isn’t the first time and it won’t be the last time I say it – I love Mary Calmes’ books and I highly recommend them all.

Audiobook
Tristan James narrates this book as well as book one and as you know he is one of my favorite narrators. His voice is delicious!
In this he doesn’t do much to differentiate Linus from Arman, but the emotion and speech patterns he uses makes it evident who is talking.
I LOVED the banter and devotion between Arman and Linus. Tristan does a beautiful job of playing the growly Arman off with the cool and calm Linus. One of my favorite parts is when the group wants to make Arman the Alpha and include John, the lion in the new “pack”. Hysterical!

I can’t wait for the next in the series and I hope we see our lion with his mate very soon!

I give this 6 of 5 hearts – Amazing!

amazing

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Everything Changes by Melanie Hansen

Dreamspinner Presents:
http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/store/product_info.php?products_id=6039

everything changesBlurb

What happens when friendship catches fire?

Former Marine and lower-leg amputee Carey Everett keeps a grueling schedule of counseling fellow war veterans and their families. The injury he received in Afghanistan forces him to rely on a reserve of strength he didn’t even know he had. A much deserved vacation will let him reconnect with his best friend, who saved his life and has been there for him through devastating injury and painful recovery.

Part-time EMT and aspiring singer Jase DeSantis has been in love with Carey for years, but he’s come to accept that his straight friend will never be able to offer more. Jase fills his days with band rehearsals, ambulance shifts, and willing groupies, all while trying to cope with debilitating PTSD.

A week of sun, fun, and music in San Diego changes Jase and Carey’s lives forever when their relationship takes an unexpected turn. Jase has been longing for that change, but it leaves Carey reeling with confusion. As Jase fights to hold things together, Carey deals with doubts, fears, and his own preconceived notions about labels and the true nature of love.

Review

Carey and Jase are friends from the military. Carey is an amputee and dealing with a new body, Jase has PTSD and is dealing with leading a normal life. They lean on each other physically and emotionally until, one day, those emotions begin to change from friend to a more sexual relationship.

Jase has always identified as bi-sexual, so he is not surprised by his attraction to Carey. Carey, is a staunch “straight” guy, who is confused by the change in his feelings and his attraction to his best friend.

In a nutshell, Carey has to come to grips with his possibly being other than “straight” and Jase needs to find room in his busy life for a real relationship.

**

This is a new author for me, and I think this is her first full length novel in this genre. As such she did an excellent job. Her writing is clear and captivating. I was definitely hooked by the story line and though she did a great job with her character development and realism as regards her subject matter.

I loved the “hurt/abuse” part of this story. I thought the PTSD and the amputation was handled realistically and compassionately. It plucked my heartstrings and felt authentic and seemed well-researched.

I loved the idea of the GFY/friends to lovers part of this story, but it didn’t pan out for me. Their relationship started out with a real sensuous bang and I thought that having them “sort of “ hook up but then go back to being friends was a nice twist on the familiar story-line. I thought, “Yeah, that feels authentic. Carey needs someone, anyone and the low-level-of-commitment- hand-job wouldn’t necessarily make him “gay” but would get him started on that track of thinking.” So when they went back to being friends, though it was frustrating and hard to read (in terms of Jase) it felt – real. But when they do finally embark on a fully physical relationship (which Carey was weirdly eager for and not anxious about) and then Carey suddenly leaves again, both physically and emotionally, I was very put off. If it had been a quick bout of recriminations and worries, that would have been fine, but months?… and a new potential relationship for both MCs? I didn’t like it. I really felt Carey treated Jase poorly and didn’t do much to earn back his trust. The end was just too quick and didn’t feel solid enough for my tastes. I appreciated that no relationship runs smoothly, but after all the build-up, the quick apology and epilogue just felt rushed.

I liked this enough to read another by this author and truly liked, but didn’t love this story.

Writing/Editing 4
Romance 3
Sex/Heat 3
Storyline 3
World Building/Characterizations 4

3.4 of 4 hearts

3.5

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